She Is: Lauren Ray on Not Settling For "Fine" and Where The Music Overlaps With Coaching
Welcome back to She Is, an interview series featuring women in business. I'm taking time to talk with the creatives, doers, and dreamers that I admire the most to learn about their work, thoughts on life, favorite places, and, of course, their jewelry.
Today I'm with Subconscious Mindset & Life Coach Lauren Ray of Never Just Fine. She's also a singer, songwriter, and producer. I met Lauren as she hosted a breakfast for founders and freelancers in London this past spring, and she has an infectiously inspiring spirit and fun-ness about her, I knew I wanted to speak more with her.
Lori: Tell me more about Never Just Fine, your mindset and coaching company.
Lauren Ray: At the heart of my business is the message of not settling for "fine". Not in the sense of never-ending hustle or optimization-culture, but as a way to encourage honest conversations about how we're actually doing and feeling, and to give ourselves permission to want more from ourselves and from life.
This was all inspired by my own experience. In my 20s, I realised I was settling for fine. I was in a fine relationship, my health was fine, I felt fine about my career, but underneath it all I wanted completely different things. I was just going through the motions and ticking boxes, and I was far from fulfilled.
After having some honest conversations with myself, and doing the inner work, I was able to completely shift my reality. Years later, during the 2020 pandemic, I trained and started my coaching business, because I wanted to help people ‘get out of their own way’ too, to stop saying they're "fine" when they're not, and to courageously go for the things they truly want.
Lori: I like the origin story of the name. It's so powerful, like we shouldn't just accept what we have without critically thinking about our lives.
Lauren Ray: My business was originally called Courage Core (courage being the heartbeat of my work) but I rebranded in 2025 after it became a running joke with clients that they couldn’t use the word “fine” with me, because it’s never honest and never how they truly wanted to feel or be. Banning the word allowed for more honest self-reflection.
I truly think everybody wants to have more honest conversations and nobody wants to settle for “just fine”. I went to a Financial Times Women In Business event last week, and my name tag saying Never Just Fine was such a great conversation starter.
Lori: It does make you think. In addition to coaching, you're also a singer-songwriter. How would you say that your work overlaps between the two, the coaching and the singing-songwriting?
Lauren Ray: I would say it overlaps a lot more than people assume. When I started training to become a coach, I realized I already had the skill set (without devaluing the extensive training that coaches go through), because as a songwriter, the skill set is listening, looking for honesty and being able to communicate an experience and a feeling concisely. When I'm coaching, I feel like it's very similar, because I'm listening for the truth and clearing through the weeds of all the nonsense that gets in the way.
I’ve always been fascinated with unpacking the human experience; What makes human beings tick? Why are we thinking a certain way? Why do we get in our own way around relationships? Why are we afraid to love? Why do different people experience the same thing completely differently? Being a songwriter and a coach allows me to explore all of the same things just in different formats.
And what's been really interesting is that since I became a coach, I've noticed my songwriting has changed. If you look at the songs I wrote before I became a coach versus all the songs I write now, I'm becoming even more mindful of language, what I'm putting out there, and how I'm seeing things. My songs now are much more hopeful, interestingly enough.
The song I just released is called I Surrender, and it's about not constantly doing the same thing and expecting the same result. It's about listening to the universe, listening to your intuition, and surrendering to that. The song before that is called Bring You Home, which is coming back to yourself and not constantly looking outside of yourself for validation.
Lori: So the work from one is informing the other, I totally see the overlap.
Lauren Ray: In so many ways! A big part of being a coach is that I have to market my work and talk about it online so clients can find me, and I find copywriting and marketing a lot easier because I already have the language skills from songwriting. I understand the power of one choosing a word over another.
Also, one of my clients even inspired a song. She said something during a session which I thought would make such a beautiful lyric, and her situation was something we could all relate to. I wrote the song and sent it to her and I said, I won't release this without your permission, because even though no one else will ever know who it’s about - you will know it’s clearly inspired by you. She listened to it and she thought it was the most incredible gift. It’s one of my favourite songs to date
Lori: I love this story. Inspiration, we never know where it might come from.
Lori: What would you say is your favorite part of your work?
Lauren Ray: I think seeing the change in someone's face the moment they have a real shift in a viewpoint about themselves or about a situation. Seeing someone's physicality change when I help change their perspective. As well as being trained in NLP, EFT, Positive Psychology and other modalities - I also have a degree in Anthropology, and I weave a lot of this way of thinking into my work. I’m all about zooming out, showing someone that their limiting beliefs, fears, and perspectives they have about themselves (and the world) aren't a sign of being broken - but simply as a result of social conditioning.
As an example, at the root of most people’s limiting beliefs, fears, and sabotaging behaviours is the fear of not being good enough. I always remind them it's not weird that you don't feel good enough. You're not broken, you have been raised in a society that requires you to not feel good enough for all these huge corporations to keep making money. Think of every single business in the world that would shrink or completely collapse if we decided we were fundamentally good enough. Plastic surgery, beauty industries, even the personal development industries, there's just so many. I like giving someone the opportunity to not feel like they are broken and to offer wider context.
Lori: I like that, it puts it into perspective, like we need to take a step back and think about things on a larger scale.
Lauren Ray: Yes! People are often nervous about doing inner work or self-respective work, but it gives so much clarity for rewiring the way you think. We’re all just human beings wandering the earth, trying to survive in this weird space that we live in.
Lori: How do you employ your own wisdom and training on yourself? I always wonder how coaches get coached!
Lauren Ray: I do believe that learning to self-coach is incredibly helpful, and it's what I really encourage my clients to do. Being able to catch your own limiting thoughts in the moment and shift them to something more empowering, having that level of self-awareness, makes a real difference. That said, I also know it's not possible to make every shift in isolation. We're relational beings, and our blind spots are called "blind" for a reason. When I know I can't move something on my own, or that working with someone else will speed up my growth, I'll do exactly that.
I'm also a big advocate for working with the body, not just the mind. There's only so much I can do alone, so I go to people who facilitate breath work and similar practices to get me out of my analytical head and into my body.
Lori: That makes total sense. It's a continuous cycle of improvement, mind and body together, and then I'm sure that you will bring some of those learnings back to your clients.
Lauren Ray: Yes, and as a coach, I don't have to have experienced all the things my clients experience, because that's not what a coach is, but I do believe that you can only take someone as far as you've been willing to go yourself. How can I expect to take someone else there if I’m unwilling to go there myself? I find the shifts in my clients are the most profound when I have also had those shifts myself, and so I'm a big believer that I benefit, and my clients benefit, from myself continually doing the work.
Lori: It’s the oxygen mask analogy.
Lauren Ray: Yes! Doing the work myself is also important so that I am not bringing my own “stuff” into a session. My job is to be a judgement-free space and to be in service of my clients goals and needs. I say to clients, you can tell me anything, I will not bat an eyelid. I can only do that if I’m working on myself.
Lori: Switching topics, you're based in London, of course, but I know you've started offering sessions and meetups in other cities worldwide. Tell me about that, and have you faced any challenges trying to grow in new places?
Lauren Ray: Part of the reason I started doing it is because I love to travel. And it was partly selfish, because I wanted to meet more people when I did. So I thought I'll just run my own events wherever I'm going! Recently, I was in South Africa for a month, and I thought I might as well try and meet some new people there. I was like, why not? What's stopping me? The only challenge is, obviously, I don't necessarily have an audience or people there, so I just ran a couple of social media ads, then I was able to gather new people in one space, and I got to meet interesting business owners. Because I've been willing to just get scrappy and invite people - so far it’s worked wherever I’ve gone. I'm also not putting pressure on any event to have a specific result, just let it evolve. I've actually been surprised how many people trust strangers on the internet and turn up.
Lori: I'm originally one of them! That's how we came together in the first place. There's a lot to be said for taking things offline sometimes and finding people in real life.
Lauren Ray: I think it's also just a nice reminder of just how many good and interesting people there are out there in the world. I like gathering people and seeing what happens.
Lori: I wish you continued success with that to keep growing! Now let's talk a little bit more about you. How would you describe your personal style?
Lauren Ray: Well, the mindset coach in me wants to say something positive and self-affirming, but I feel like my true answer is I don't really feel like I have a personal style. I think because I'm a bit of a chameleon personality-wise, I look different depending on my mood, so one day I'll be like very casual, almost like tomboyish, but the next day I'll want to be more corporate, and the next day I'll be more like earth hippie, spiritual person, so I don't think I have a set personal style, I just think I have clothes that fit certain days and different types of things.
I love the idea of having a more defined style, and I think as I'm getting older, I am starting to be more intentional about pieces of clothing, but I also think my personal style is impacted by how I feel in my body. If I look back at my whole life, I have had very different style personalities.
Also my hair! Name a style of haircut, I've had it. I had a big show, a music show, in February last year, and I randomly went to the hairdressers that day and asked for a fringe. I've never had a fringe in my whole life, but I went for it.
Lori: I like the whimsy of that! What about the best thing you bought yourself lately?
Lauren Ray: A year ago, I bought a loose, black linen jumpsuit, and I have worn it so much. I'm the kind of person that will buy something and wear it exclusively for ages until I either break it or lose it, and then I'll buy another thing and I'll wear that.
Lori: When it comes to jewelry, are you team silver or gold or do you wear both?
Lauren Ray: I’m team gold. I feel like I was told at some point as a teenager that I should only wear silver (for my skin tone or something I dunno), but I have a bit of a rebellious streak, so I think ever since then I only wear gold.
Lori: What's in your everyday jewelry rotation, if anything, or are you always wearing different things?
Lauren Ray: Similar to what I said about the clothes, I tend to buy pieces of jewelry, and I'll wear only that piece until I either lose it or feel the urge to buy something new and switch to that. I am more of an earrings person, occasionally a necklace and a couple of rings. I keep trying to get into bracelets but they never feel right somehow so always end up taking them off. The only consistent thing is my Oura ring, which is the gold ring that I wear every single day without fail.
Lori: When it comes to London life, do you have any favorite neighborhoods or places you like to hang out?
Lauren Ray: I love walking in North London where I live. The Parkland Walk through to Highgate and Alexandra Palace is my go-to. And despite having lived in London for 18 years now, I still feel like a tourist to this city, and I enjoy the iconic places and views. Being down by the Thames, exploring and walking from London Bridge along to Tower Bridge, just feels good.
Lori: When it comes to future goals and dreams, are you working on anything bigger than what you’re doing now?
Lauren Ray: Always, yes, I’ve got big visions for my work. I’ve got a new membership for business owners which I’m excited to keep growing, and someday I’m picturing a festival and retreats - tying in personal development with music. It’s all about building community and going forward.
Lori: Do you have a quote or a mantra that you live by?
Lauren Ray: (thinking for a while) Mine would just be, “why not?” I’ve never regretted going for things and giving it a go…I’ve regretted things I haven’t done more.
